Christmas

This is just a short post. I think I am writing this more to get it out of my head than anything else. 

Last night I asked the kids if they were going to be really disappointed if we have to postpone our Disney trip for a week or so. Of course being the good natured kids they are they said no. Merry then said, "Maybe we can spend Christmas morning in Disney, we can bring a little tree and everything" then she got quieter, "I wouldn't mind not being here on Christmas too many memories in this house and the ones I remember are the bad ones."

Anyone ever ask why we do Disney so much I am going to bring them back to this post. I have spent the last two years of my life trying desperately to fill their little minds with good memories.

Part of me is glad the kids were old enough to really have solid memories of their amazing Daddy but Merry who was only 10 when he died doesn't remember anything before cancer. I am not sure what is better not remembering anything or only remembering the bad. 

Okay that is all for my depressing post of the week. I never thought I would dread a holiday especially Christmas. Okay I am going to go eat some chocolate and get over myself :)